Friday, August 22, 2008

Yes (Wo)Man

Yes, I am Feeling Much Better. The Doctor gave me Antibiotics and I swear, I Felt Better Overnight. I am not even Sneezing anymore!

Yes, I know: The Wedding is One Week from Today. Seven Days Left of Singlehood.

Yes, The Apartment Is A Mess and All Of Our Relatives will be here on Tuesday for A Barbeque.

Yes, I called A New, Highly Recommended By Totally Awesome Fiancé’s Sister, Cleaning Woman to take care of The Mess.

Yes, we did in fact just Furiously Clean for The Cleaning Woman. The Apartment is Spotless now!

Yes, of course, we hid The Scotch.

Yes, I think I have Lost Weight! My Diet Tip? Um, I call it The Bridal Flu. I had A Bri(de)rus.

Yes, those are Bags under my eyes. I am exhausted because besides An Antibiotic, The Doctor also prescribed an Anti-Inflammatory. He told me it might make me “Hyper.” What he really meant to say is, “This Drug might keep you Awake For Hours and You Will Never Sleep Again!” I haven’t Slept in Days. This would have been Awesome in College. All I can say is, “Thank God For MSNBC and Olympic Field Hockey!”

Yes, I know I still need to get My Nails done. I don’t want to Bite Them Off, so I am waiting for The Last Minute. Also, I don’t know Where To Go to Get This Done. I am Nail Naïve.

Yes, that is A Brand New Brazilian Bikini Wax! Thanks for Noticing!

1 comment:

Green said...

Maybe TA-SIL can suggest a nail person? If you get desperate, you can go to the spa in any nice hotel in LA and they'll do a fine job.