Tuesday, June 19, 2007

How I Spent My The Daily Randi Vacation Weekend

Finally, The Daily Randi took A Vacation!

Friday, we were off to Palm Springs! I just Love Palm Springs – I like The Heat and The Old Crazy Architecture, and That Funny Looking Desert Stuff they have everywhere. Plus, My Idea of Vacation is Lounging Around A Pool In My Bikini, Reading Trashy Magazines, Whilst Sipping Refreshing Beverages and that is all there really is to do in Palm Springs. Totally Awesome Boyfriend had Never Been. I lured him there with The Promise Of My Bikini. Plus, I packed A Bottle Of Johnnie Walker Black for him, too. And I told him we could go to An Indian Casino. He was In.

Unfortunately, Totally Awesome Boyfriend has to Work Late on Fridays. So, we didn’t leave until almost Nine PM. We traveled through The Desert in The Dark. It was kind of Creepy. We were booked to stay at La Quinta Resort and Spa, which is this Fabulous Old School Hotel. It was Huge! In fact, it was So Big, we wandered around, looking for Our Bungalow in the Dark for like, Forty Minutes! It was Hot and Dry and there was No One around to Help. I figured this must be the way An Illegal Mexican Immigrant would feel if it were to Cross The American Border and Search For A Luxurious Hotel Room. At one point, I thought I spied An Oasis! But, it was only one of The Hot Tubs. When we finally found our Room, it had A Fireplace, which made us Laugh. Heck, we have A Fireplace at Home! Who needs A Room With A Fireplace anymore? Besides, it was like 115 Degrees outside. What we really needed was An Iceplace. Well, A Niceplace would just have to suffice!

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This Place is Really Nice!

Saturday morning, we woke up, had A Very Expensive Breakfast and then Lounged Around The Pool. Since there are 41 Pools on the property, we basically had Our Very Own Pool. We even had A Hammock, which Totally Awesome Boyfriend made good use of. I broke open A Bottle Of Fine Expensive White Wine which I had had in My Fridge at Home, for like, Years, having Won It in A Wine Selling Contest at The Trendy Los Angeles Hotel Hotspot I worked in long ago. It was Delicious!

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I shall Drink No Wine before It's Time! Guess What?! It's Time!

Saturday Night, after Working Out in the Fabulous Fitness Facilities and enjoying A Very Expensive Mexican Dinner, we went to The Indian Casino. I am Not Much of A Gambler, so I really just stood around and Watched. But, Totally Awesome Boyfriend didn’t like it. He was Put Off by the Lack Of Dice on the Craps Table (They can’t use Dice in California.) He claims that is Why he Lost Seventy Five Dollars. But, I seem to recall The Same Thing Happening when we were in Vegas and they use Dice there. I think he just Can’t Admit He May Have Lost Seventy Five Dollars.

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This Indian won't be Shedding A Tear because Totally Awesome Boyfriend gave him Seventy Five Dollars! (And also because Totally Awesome Boyfriend Never Litters.)

Sunday, we arranged for Late Check Out. So we had time to Work Out in the morning and Sit Around The Pool and Read. It was Super Quiet and Very Relaxing.

On our way back, I asked Totally Awesome Boyfriend to stop off at The Outlet Stores – and He Did! Is he An Awesome Boyfriend or what?! I bought A Cute Purse at The Coach Outlet Store and Totally Awesome Boyfriend bought New Shoes.

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A Real Desert Oasis!

When we arrived Home, I checked on My Patio Plants. Before we left, My Strawberry Plant had had A Big, Ripe Strawberry on it. I was Really Looking Forward to Tasting It! But, alas, upon Inspection, My Strawberry was Gone! Someone had savored My Strawberry! Totally Awesome Boyfriend told me he thought it could have been A Cat or A Squirrel, but this Berry was Plucked Perfectly! What Animal could do such a thing? Besides, only The Ripe Berry was eaten. An Animal would have eaten it All -- even The Unripe Ones. My Theory is that Someone snuck into Our Patio while we were Away and Stole My Strawberry! A Brand New Berry is about to Turn Red soon, so I will be Keeping My Eye Out for The Sneaky Strawberry Swiper!

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And now, Dear Readers, I leave you with A Fabulous Slideshow of The Daily Randi Vacation Weekend. This Week, I present it to you as if you were viewing it from Under Water, which is exactly how I viewed most things this weekend. Please Enjoy.


Michael said...

Squirrels have very nimble claws for plucking your delicious, slightly tangy, strawberry. And then for putting the seeds into someone else's teeth.

Michelle said...

LOL, Randi!! Looks like you caught your squirrel!! (see above) Sounds like a fantastic weekend! :)

Anonymous said...

Dear TDR,

This made me honest-to-G-d LOL:

I figured this must be the way An Illegal Mexican Immigrant would feel if it were to Cross The American Border and Search For A Luxurious Hotel Room.

Also, I heart heart heart PS. HEART it. Gambling and frosty beverages by the pool = luf. Yay vacation!

Nanette said...

Sounds like a fabulous weekend! I, sadly, have never been to Palm Springs. Hubby doesn't like the heat and we just haven't tried to make it out in winter.

Aimee said...

Wow, how fun! An occasion, or just because?

Anonymous said...

This is the funniest thing I've read all week.

nik said...

The Daily Randi in my neck of the woods, yay! (And without the Betty Ford drive-by this time, phew!)