Thursday, March 08, 2007

Famous People The Daily Randi Has Waited On Week

TODAY’S CELEBRITY: Anna Nicole Smith

To be Fair, I didn’t actually Wait On Anna Nicole Smith. Rather, she had Her Birthday Party at The Trendy (At The Time) Los Angeles Hotel Restaurant I worked at. The Party was in The Back Room and they Special Requested Cocktail Servers to serve them, instead of Food Servers. But, The Wait Staff still had to Help Out a bit.

Anna Nicole Smith arrived with Her Entire Entourage – Her Crazy Pink-Haired Assistant, Her Teenage Son, Various Drag Queens, and of course, Howard K. Stern who had Booked The Entire Party and was our Go To Person. This was before Anna Nicole Smith had Lost All That Weight On Trim Spa/Got Liposuction/Gastric Bypass Surgery, so she was in All Her Crazy Big Anna Nicole Smith Glory. The Party was being taped for Her Show On E!. But, Howard K. Stern failed to mention this when he Made His Reservation and The Hotel Staff was furious. Whenever someone Films Something at The Hotel, they need to Get Permission and Give Notice so that The Other Patrons And Guests can be notified about The Intrusion. If it I A Busy Night, The Hotel sometimes said, “No.” This was A Busy Night. The Wait Staff decided that Howard K. Stern was Extra Smarmy for Not Notifying Us about The Cameras and Lights, but The Hotel elected to Do Nothing since it was A Huge Affair.

Anna Nicole Smith was Plenty Boozed Up, High As A Kite and Making Out With All Of Her Guests. She made out with A Cocktail Server, too. But, she was also Nice Enough to Pose With Some of Our Guests, bemused by Her Presence and Sign Autographs. I joked that I was going to take My Photo with her and then make it My Hanukkah Card for that year. But, I got Busy With Tables and Missed My Opportunity.

I still think That would have been An Awesome Hanukkah Card, though.


Green said...

That *would* have been a great Hanukah card. You know what would also have been a fun Hanukah card? If you were standing next to Anna Nicole and she were making eyes at you, but you were ignoring her and making eyes at her assistant Kim.

Michael said...

New lyric to Adam Sandler's "Hanukkah Song":

So many Jews are in show biz
Anna Nicole isn't
But her smarmy lawyer/boyfriend/possible murderer is

Anonymous said...

You wanna put that shiksa on your Hannukah card? What would jesus say if he didn't not exist?