The Facts Of Life

As A Drama Teacher, I am naturally required to Stage Performances at the end of my semesters or quarters or summers. This being The End of My Big Summer Gig, it is time for The Big Summer Gig Performances. Now, these shows may not be heading to Broadway anytime soon, but I am A Very Proud Teacher, nonetheless. My students work so hard Singing and Dancing their little hearts out! And I have So Much Fun teaching them How To Sing And Dance! I really do Love My Job.

In the past, my work has always felt like A Tree Falling In The Forest, though. No one ever really pays any mind to what I do for a living. All my MOM knows is I Am No Longer An Actress And She Told Me So. She sees my Current Success as A Vindication Of Her Long Promoted Prediction Of My Ultimate Demise. But, she fails to recognize How Much I Love What I Do. I am certainly, No Failure.

I am happy to report that Totally Awesome Boyfriend does recognize How Much I Love What I Do, though. I was surprised and flattered when he suggested coming to Watch My End Of The Summer Shows. But, Show he did and he even brought An Apple for the teacher! And he took pictures, too! These are just a few of the ways he easily earns The Totally Awesome Moniker, you see.

After the show, I introduced him to My Class of Twenty Four, Very-Excited-Because-They-Just-Finished-Performing-In-Front-Of-Their-Friends-And-Family, Aged Eight To Thirteen Year Old Girls. “This is My Boyfriend, Totally Awesome Boyfriend!” I announced.

One little girl asked, incredulously, “You have A Boyfriend?” She sounded just like My MOM. But then she added, “I‘m not allowed to have A Boyfriend until I turn 15!”

Another raised her hand. “Is Your Boyfriend Bald? Or does he Shave His Head?” These girls seemed so curious that I Could Have A Life Outside Of Their Class. But, they also were Stunned to discover that I Was A Grown-Up, I think. All along, I suppose they thought I Couldn’t Possibly Be That Old. They probably pictured me going out with A Cast Member from Disney’s Mega Hit, High School Musical. A Cast Member from Disney’s Mega Hit, High School Musical would surely possess A Very Full Head Of Shiny, Luscious Hair.

“Ummm, he Shaves His Head, actually.” I replied. The Girls just Stared at each other in Astonishment.

Later, in another class, and after Totally Awesome Boyfriend had left, I overheard two girls talking.

“I met Miss The Daily Randi’s Boyfriend,” one whispered. “He has No Hair.”

“Wow,” replied the other girl, baffled and shaking her head. “That is Just Like My Dad!”