The Reason I Don't Like To Wear Genes

Earlier this week, I woke up, looked in the mirror and saw My MOM. I don't mean The Loving, Sweet Mom of my youth. No, instead, my reflection was that of The Over 40 MOM I have become much more familiar with in the last twenty years. Seemingly over night, Lines engraved themselves around my eyes and Dark Circles etched themselves just above my cheekbones. Worse, I seem to have developed Ugly Saggy Pouches that droop below my lower eyelid! How could this have happened So Fast?!

Granted, this week I really have gotten very little sleep. So, that could explain The Dark Circles. And, I had a stupid fight with Good Friend, which left me crying. So, that could explain The Ugly Droopy Pouches. But, I have no explanation for The Sudden Appearance Of Fine Lines. Other than, well, other than I Am Getting Old. I can't say Oil Of Olay didn't Warn Me about Just This Sort Of Thing.

You should know, I don't really look like My MOM at all. Rather, I resemble My Father exactly. I absolutely have His Eyes. So, when I looked in the mirror and saw My MOM's Wrinkles, Pouches, and Circles around My Eyes, I was a bit Disturbed. What were They doing On Me? Easily Annoyed Sister is supposed to inherit This Crap! Quickly, I checked my closet to see if I had received any of My MOM's Much-Coveted Gucci Bags in the middle of the night, as well. But, alas, I had Not.

Hopefully, this Wrinkly-Droopy-Eye Awfulness is just a result of Too Many Late Nights Staying Up To Watch Tivod Season Finales this week. Over the weekend, I intend on catching up on my sleep. My Regular Youthful Glow should make its return by Sunday, I assume.

Unless, it doesn't. And if that happens, well, if That Happens, I guess I am Doomed to A Lifetime Obsessing over Botox Treatments and Skin Creams.

And, of course, talking to My Children LIKE THIS.