Monday, June 12, 2006

Yes, They Hired Us For Our Boobs Looks.

Many of you know, I used to be A Waitress. Actually, The Technical Term is Food Server. I Served Food for Nearly Fifteen Years before I finally Quit, or as My MOM likes to put it, GOT MY SHIT TOGETHER. When I moved to Los Angeles, I was hired right away by A Trendy West Side Los Angeles Hotel Restaurant that was just about to open. It was The Best Worst Job I ever had and The Food Servers all became Very Close. We worked together for almost five years before we started to Quit and/or Get Fired Let Go Were Forced To Resign(ed) On Our Own Accord. The Rapper, DMX once Paid My Rent. One time, I waited on Jeremy Piven and when I Refused To Flirt With Him, he called The Manager over and requested “A Hotter Waitress.” Elton John Doesn’t Do Buffets.

Over the weekend, I decided it would be fun to get The Old Gang together again for A Joyous Brunch at A Trendy Los Angeles Restaurant We Never Worked At. There is Great Pleasure in having Food Served To You when one used to Serve Food. Even though none of us would ever be caught dead Working A Brunch Shift, they sat us near the kitchen in case they needed some extra hands.

Here is An Adorable Picture of JJ, Me, and My Boobs! By the way, JJ Still has not done her Sidework.
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And here is A Lovely Picture of Donna Marie and Stephanie and Stephanie’s Baby. The Baby’s Name is Kiera. But I call it The Trendy West Side Los Angeles Hotel Restaurant Baby because Stephanie’s Husband used to be A Food Server at The Trendy West Side Los Angeles Hotel Restaurant, too! In fact, they met at work. We all suspect The Trendy West Side Los Angeles Hotel Restaurant Baby was conceived with The Gentle Assistance of The Fabulous Trendy Hotel Stay Discount we used to receive as A Perk of our Miserable, Yet Trendy, Jobs.
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This is a picture of Devon reminiscing with Donna Marie. Devon is trying to recall The Specials for the evening of April 24, 2002. Donna Marie remembers them all. But, she probably has them written down on the inside of her nails or something.
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This is Me and Devon. I am remembering how I didn’t get Thanksgiving Day Off in 2003, even though I Submitted A Special Holiday Request nearly Three Weeks Earlier. Devon is recalling how She Had It Off, even though She Didn't Request Not To Work!
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The Daily Randi says, "Hands Off My Sidekick!!!"
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Needless to say, A Fabulous Time was had By All!

And everyone is Very Jealous of Me and My Sidekick.

And, of course, My Boobs.

The End.


Michael said...

*I* wanna be your sidekick. I can remember all that stuff you need to recall, and I'm bigger than the back of a "food server"'s fingernails. Plus if it means being close to you & your hot dotty dress & your boobs...

Randi said...

Dear Michael,

Of course, You can be My Sidekick! I am So Flattered!! But, just so you know, I will be Fiddling With You a lot. I have a feeling you won't mind though.

This Is Just One Of The Ways I Think You Are Totally Awesome,

Anonymous said...

Sidekick. Awww. Cute. :)

Kook-a-licious said...

YOU are seriously funny girl. Ever think of becoming a comedian?