Happily (Never!) Ever After

Last week, I met The Cutest Boy Ever Ever Ever! Which is a Huge Relief because it has been Weeks since I last heard from The Worst Guy Ever Ever Ever. I am trying my hardest to think of him instead as The Worst Guy Never Never Never, so that when he finally does call with his Flimsy Excuse For Not Calling Sooner, I will be able to Kick Him To The Curb, sans emotions. Naturally, I am hoping dating The Cutest Boy Ever Ever Ever will also be of Huge Assistance.

After all, The Cutest Boy Ever Ever Ever is everything The Worst Guy (Never!) Ever (Never!) Ever (Never!) is not. The Cutest Boy Ever Ever Ever has called me Every Single Day Since We Met just to say Hello! The Worst Guy (Never!) Ever (Never!) Ever (Never!) has called me maybe Five Times in the past Six Months and most of those calls are spent Apologizing for Not Calling Me Sooner. The Cutest Boy Ever Ever Ever looks like the type to Wear His Seat Belt When Driving. The Worst Guy (Never!) Ever (Never!) Ever (Never!) hates His Seat Belt and Never (Ever!) Wears It. Most importantly, The Worst Guy (Never!) Ever (Never!) Ever (Never!) claims to be Single, but I really doubt it, considering that the last time He Phoned To Apologize For Not Phoning Sooner, he was en route to His (Ex!) Girlfriend's House. But, The Cutest Boy Ever Ever Ever is Definitely Single!

Well, Single for the Time Being... Just give me A Few Weeks until I have My Claws In Him.